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"He's going to audition for the Vienna Boys' Choir!" -- Gorilla Monsoon
"The Bushwhackers are living proof that the Three Stooges had children" -- Gorilla Monsoon
Gorilla Monsoon commenting on Nick Volkoff's singing: "If you hung him for being a good singer, you'd be hanging an innocent man!"
"You can see the life LITERALLY oozing from his body!" -- Gorilla Monsoon
"He has a lower occipital proturbance!" -- Gorilla Monsoon
"What a nice leverage spin move."
-- Gorilla Monsoon trying to explain a botched spot during Hogan vs. Warrior, WrestleMania VI 1990